Jokes!

Heres a quick one:

Two whales go to a bar:

One whale says "OOOOOOOoooooWhaooooo"

The other says "Steve, go home, your drunk!"
 
Dunno if you've heard this one, it was very popular at school when I was little. A very stupid joke, if you ask me :p

There were once three men: The Danish, the Swede and the Norwegian. They had a competition about who could urinate the farthest. First, the Swede peed two meters. Then, the Danish peed five meters. Then, the Norwegian peed so far that they couldn't even see where it landed.

The next day, they watched TV, and there was reported yellow rain in China. :p
 
Skaara Dreadlocks said:
Dunno if you've heard this one, it was very popular at school when I was little. A very stupid joke, if you ask me :p

There were once three men: The Danish, the Swede and the Norwegian. They had a competition about who could urinate the farthest. First, the Swede peed two meters. Then, the Danish peed five meters. Then, the Norwegian peed so far that they couldn't even see where it landed.

The next day, they watched TV, and there was reported yellow rain in China. :p
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We have a ton of these types of jokes in Poland, but with "the Pole, the Russian and the German". :lol: Here's one of my recent favourites:

The Pole, the Russian and the German are sitting together on a train (note: this is one of those passenger trains where the wagons are divided up into compartments). They are arguing about which one of them is the best thief.
"Okay, turn the lights off," says the German.
After a moment the lights go out and the Russian realizes that his shoe laces are missing.
"Nah, you're weak. Turn the lights off and I'll show you how we steal in Russia," says the Russian.
The light is turned off and then back on - the Pole realizes his watch is gone from his wrist.
"You're both weak. I'll show you how to steal," says the Pole.
The lights go out again, only to come back on in a matter of seconds. The Russian and German look at each other, realize that nothing has changed and start to make fun out of the Pole. Suddenly, the conductor walks in and says:
"Gentlemen, we have to evacuate. Someone stole the fucking tracks!"
 
Darkbringer said:
Ok racist joke:
An Albanian, a Palestinian and an Iraqi were sitting in a car. Who was driving?
The police.
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A guy in my class told that joke and some more. I think they're funny, but racism is racism.. :p

What's the difference between an over-driven rat and an over-driven person?
There are breaking-trails in front of the rat.
 
He's one all of you have to have heard.

What do you call a bunch of white people running down a hill?
avalanche

What do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill?
mud slide

What do you call a bunch of natives running down a hill?
jail break!
 
Have you heard the joke about the baby with AIDS?

It never gets old.




I just saw a Nazi drive past me at 88 mph.

Probably going Back to the Führer




I read something the other day that made me piss myself.

It was a sign that said "Toilets closed"
 
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